Some of us (We) more readily accept pain over paradise because misery feels more like the reality that we believe—the reality that we have come to know—the reality that we deserve. This is either the greatest lie of which we’ve ever convinced ourselves, or it is simply the hardest truth we’ve come to understand.
People want so badly to be understood that they sometimes wish the damage inflicted on them to be inflicted on everyone else so that they can feel that others truly empathize with them. Hence, the cliché, Misery Loves Company, but it’s not entirely true. The real trick of it is that even when others have gone through something similar or subjectively worse, a person still won’t believe the other individual because, while they want someone to understand them, they don’t think it’s possible. They feel their experience is so uniquely awful that no one else could’ve gone through it, or maybe they don’t have the emotional availability to hurt for someone else because they are so deeply affected by their own situation. Sometimes, it’s simply because they don’t feel that they deserve that kind of empathy. It becomes self-inflicted, and this is how a person isolates themselves from everyone they know and reality in general.
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